My blog page is a place where I'm serving the Lord through encouraging others.

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Bullhead City, Arizona, United States
I am a 50 yr young disabled woman with many chronic painful physical afflictions & a illness. I am married to a wonderful man with 2 adult children. I grew up in & out of church. One of my Uncles is a recently retired Pastor . I have been saved since 1996. I love serving the Lord & fellow-shipping with my church family,family/friends! I started this blog because I was inspired and encouraged by a couple of friends blogs and felt the Lord prompting me to start a blog page after our Women's Retreat in August 2009 to use the gift of encouragement he has given me to journal what he is doing in my life and to pass on to others articles that encourage me and help me in my walk with the Lord. My prayer is that you will feel the love of Jesus and that you will be inspired and encouraged by my post. I'm just a servant Girl and a Broken Vessel called to be a Heiress of Light for the Lord. The things I post will be from my heart and things that speak to my heart. Sometimes I will just journal about Life,Family etc. My prayer is that my blog will be a source of encouragement to all my friends, family members and followers.

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Monday, November 15, 2010

Tender Mercy

This one goes out to all my family and friends who are going through or have gone through this with a beloved friend or family member. I  have had several friends and family members struggle with cancer, some are still here battling and some are in Heaven. I have had about 6 to 7 friends within the last year pass away one right after the other and this blog really ministered to my heart today so I wanted to pass it on to minister to others today. Praying it brings you comfort and peace in your unanswered questions and grief. <3

Tender Mercy :

My friend is dying. And I am really disillusioned by this reality. Of course I am praying for a miracle, we all are. But unless that miracle comes quickly, the cancer has spread too far, too deep, too much.
This young mom, precious friend, graceful woman is a beautiful part of so many people’s world. And just three weeks ago, she had no reason to give cancer much of a thought. Now it looms in the back of every thought. I hate that.
Why her?
Why now?
Why cancer?
It’s times like these I open up my Scriptures with a different kind of tenacity. I don’t just want some truth. I need some truth. I need some truth to march into my sagging heart and my off kilter mind and boss me around- reign me in- pull me close.
I need to feel God is still good. God is still just. God is still here.
I know it. I teach it. I believe it. But today I need to feel it. I need to literally feel Him come close and fiercely wrap His most tender mercy around this situation. Around my friend. Around her grieving family. Around all the doubts this is causing in our friends who are mad at God.
And then I remembered something I just read one week ago.
Do you remember when Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit and were banished from the Garden of Eden? Whenever I’ve read that story, I thought they had to leave paradise because God was punishing them. God was disappointed in them. God was giving them what they deserved.
But I was wrong.
There were two special trees in the Garden of Eden. One was the ‘tree of the knowledge of good and evil.’ This was the one with the forbidden fruit. The other was the ‘tree of life.’ This was the one that gave Adam and Eve perpetual life- no diseases- no death- no sagging body parts. (Okay I’m not sure about that last benefit but I’m banking on this reality in heaven.)
When they ate of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, sin entered in. Sin corrupted everything. And at that point, it was God’s absolute love and most tender mercy that ushered Adam and Eve out of the Garden. Not His anger or retaliation.
They had to leave. For if they’d been allowed to stay, they would have kept eating from the tree of life and lived forever…. wallowing in sin. Wallowing in all the brokenness sin brings with it. Disease. Fear. Heartbreak. Separation from God. And God couldn’t stand that for the people He loved.
So, it was His love that made them leave. And allowed them to die. So that they could experience the resurrected life His son would one day provide. Brokenness to redemption.
I’m still sad about my friend. And rightfully so. But something about this story… this truth… this new revelation of the unfathomable depth of God’s love settles me. Breathes hope into my dread. And trust into my doubts. And once again, gives me a soft place to land.

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The Crown that I wear does not tarnish;
It's not made of worldly ores. I don't need to polish and store it in a vault or behind metal doors. The Crown is a gift from my Father whose Son died so that I could be free. What a honor it is just to wear it, For His last thoughts on Earth were of me. The Crown has speacial meaning; It's not about worldly success. It stands for the Love of My Lord and Saviour,Which I wear every day like a Princess.